The workplace is increasingly frenetic as open plan offices allow you to be party to everyone’s conversation whether you want to or not. As a very sociable, fairly extravert person myself, it can be a recipe for distraction and time wasting. While we need people at work to be effective in teams, good at collaboration and relationship building, there are just some times when you need the peace to think.

Interruptions are disastrous for thought processes or for really enjoying what you do. We know that people get into flow when they are truly engaged in an activity which really plays to their strengths. Nowadays a ‘closed door policy’ is likely to be met with condemnation or suspicion so a constant stream of, ‘You’re not busy are you?’ or ‘Can I just interrupt for a minute?’(you just did!) are often met with assent but are ruinous to both concentrated intellectual activity and creativity. Apparently those who are regularly interrupted make 50% more mistakes and take twice as long to complete tasks.

Personality comes into it too. Some of us have a preference for going off into a darkened corner all alone before we can begin to get creative, only emerging to engage the team by saying, ‘Here’s an idea. What do you think?’ Others don’t know what they think at all until they are in the middle of a discussion which sparks their ideas for them. Yet most business thinking takes place in group settings, with questionable results. The word ‘brainstorm’ is frequently used to describe what turns out to be a rather vapid and uninspiring discussion by a few people in the group followed by an agreement to act in a fairly predictable fashion. Interestingly, electronic brainstorming is much more effective- using the internet to get a lot of people sitting by themselves somewhere to come up with ideas in privacy and get immediate feedback and further development of the idea.

You are also never truly alone these days. With constant interruptions from phones, e-mail and forays onto the internet which then seduce you on to your Facebook page to check status updates (that’s what you are doing right now, isn’t it – not procrastinating or time wasting?), there is very little space in the day for thinking.

Tunnel vision doesn’t help. Often people are so wedded to their work that they never read a book, go see a film or take a ten minute walk at lunchtime and look at their surroundings (no time, you see) As a result, they get duller and narrower in their thinking. Exactly the opposite of what we need to get us through this challenging economic time – same old, same old thinking without stimulation or challenge.

Now, I feel pretty worried about organisations in which key people cannot even make the space to reflect on their actions, their choices, their people and themselves. That way wrong decisions and catastrophe lie.

In fact the only time many people get is when they embark on a coaching programme which gives them space, the opportunity in both a supportive and challenging environment to consider their actions and their next move, protected from the outside world. It is in this setting that they are likely to experience those ‘ah hah’ moments when a fresh insight occurs or a penny drops into place

So, when do you make time to review?

How do you shut out the noise that surrounds you?

How much do you question and review your ideas and your actions?

There are also those creatures I call ‘stress carriers’. These are the people (often known as the boss) who cause stress all around them, induce panic and anxiety and then go off home feeling better for having let off steam,  leaving everyone traumatised in their wake.

Those who have greater emotional awareness tend to be most at risk of picking up on the stress of others. Being more empathic, they notice and identify with what stressed colleagues are going through. They adopt the other’s mannerisms- talk faster, over breath, become tense and start thinking negatively.

Now let’s get one thing straight- pressure can be good for us. It’s what gets things done. No pressure- you’d be bored. More pressure than you can cope with, then you may experience stress.

A fairly forceful client of mine is prone to  saying,’You’re not being shot at in Afghanistan, what can you possibly be stressed about?’ Which can of course cause its own stress. . . . I am going to throw down my own gauntlet, say ‘I don’t do stress’ and give you a bit of tough love. If you can demonstrate to me that it will be useful and lead to successful outcomes then I’ll get stressed too. Until that day I will make the choice to remain stress free. Which means I will face the following assumptions/challenges:
Stress is natural - well, yes if facing a sabre toothed tiger then the narrowing down of focus caused by fight or flight may well  get you out of trouble. The rest of the time, those reactions will not help one whit and will lead to a very poor performance at work for you and your team. So take control and choose your reaction.

What – are you a bit thick? Don’t you get it? - while I do understand that the economy is in crisis, that heating bills are going to be high, that it can be hard to run a business, etc, etc I still don’t get how running around like a panicking headless chicken is going to help anyone. Again, if you can tell me how it would help, I’ll work myself into a frenzy now to be of assistance!

You have no imagination Actually, I have just as much ability as the next person to visualise all the most awful scenarios and end of days outcomes. I choose not to think, ‘What’s the worst that can happen?’ but rather ‘What can I do to get through this/make it right/succeed? It’s a much better use of my time and energy. Visualise the best outcome and then put your energy into achieving it.

You have to be really anxious or your performance is no good. Really? And your evidence is? When I got back from The US after giving a speech, a Chief Executive said, ‘ You must have been terrified’ When I said,’err, no’ , he said ‘Well you must have been rubbish then!’ ( remember the stress carrier concept above. . .we’re working on the impact of his communication style. I happen to know that in his own way, he meant well) I filled him in about the science he had missed and explained how I see these public speaking as a brilliant way to communicate what I am passionate about not an automatic stressor. Being stressed does not make you perform better in any aspect of your personal or professional life. Stop it!

Even though everyone has a similar amount of the cold or flu virus in their system, not everyone develops the symptoms. So, the next time someone tells you how stressed they are – don’t catch their disease. Smile back and tell them how fortunate you feel you are to be alive now, to have lots of challenges in your life and that you are just quietly intent on dealing with them.
If, however, you feel your quality of life is really suffering from stress, find a good Cognitive Behavioural Therapist. They are brilliant at curing the condition. Don’t waste any more time.

If you are stressing about your work, coaching based on cognitive behavioural principles can make that a thing of the past. Again – get on with it.
To hear Averil talk on BBC Radio Scotland about Second Hand Stress click here.

So what does this play have to do with networking skills? Well, once the journalists on the case have exhausted all the logical avenues and hit every possible wall, they pause to think and actually reverse the problem. If you have ever done the ‘who do you want to meet?’ exercise on one of our courses, you will be familiar with the thinking. In this case they need to get to Pervez Musharraf, the then President who is the only person who can grant a pardon. How do you get to him, well you try and think who knows him. The journalists focus on Prince Charles and, having identified a way to him, next think of an angle that will possibly prompt him into action. Although we know that there is happy ending of sorts, I won’t reveal more as the process is truly fascinating.

Networking is a key leadership skill that takes many forms. Fortunately is will rarely be as critical as for Mirza Hussain, but it is well worth developing the networking reflex: the open-minded attitude that can get you to anyone in the world with just a couple of links.

I know Halloween is traditionally a day for disguise but I am not sure what this notion is masquerading as. Always eager to see support for more women on boards, I was interested to hear that Cameron was talking about the beneficial effect of women on boards.

In reaction to the 49% increase in FTSE salaries for top directors, David Cameron has suggested that this is yet another good reason to have women on boards as it will ‘drive down pay’. Now, we all know more women on the board is good for profits and innovation so more women is certainly good for business but I’m not sure what evidence or argument there is for using women to drive down men’s pay!

His argument seems to be that women would end the ‘closed shop’ currently existing in most British boardrooms. Wow, that is going to make them a popular choice for board appointment isn’t it? Pick a woman – she’ll drive your income down! One assumes women, showing more emotional intelligence, might be in touch with what the general public is likely to think of these enormous pay rises and resist increasing the differential between the most senior and the general hoi polloi – the workers at a rather delicate time.

However, it sounds a little like Cameron is assuming we can get senior women to do the same job as senior men but for much less money. . .  . We know women have, in fact, been doing this for a long time. The Equal Pay Act came into law in 1970 but predictions are that it will take another 98 years to actually get equal pay. Surely he can’t be assuming that we can bank on women being prepared to sell themselves so cheaply and be treated so unfairly?

Maybe it’s just the way I’m reading it. What do you think?

A certain bank recently canvassed its employees on the topic of flexibility. Interestingly, when the results were in, they discovered that men and women were equally enthusiastic about the concept of flexible working. So far, so good.

Further questioning revealed that:

Women wanted flexibility so that they could fulfil more of their other important roles in life – homemaker, carer and so on.

Men wanted flexibility to . . . .play golf or take up other personal activities.

So if a woman seeks flexibility in her organisation, the chances are that a male boss is likely to perceive this as an opportunity for inessential, extra curricular activities – because that’s what he might use flexibility for himself. As a result, women are often judged as less serious or committed because they want flexibility and the issue is not supported as it could be.

The other fascinating story was from a financial services firm that is very keen to become more diverse. Every year they ask managers to put forward the people they deem ‘Talent’ or High Potential. Women have been making up about 24% of the final list, despite making up 49% of the workforce in question.

This year when the request went out for the talent list, they did one thing differently. (They didn’t nag or exhort or introduce quotas) The document for each manager just gave a break down of the percentage men and women who were eligible. This year’s final list had over 40% women on it.  Somehow, seeing those numbers reminded managers that there women there with loads of talent – merit even- who were probably just quietly getting on doing a good job and not fighting to get ahead.

The debate about quotas keeps coming back to whether women will be appointed on merit. Our argument throughout has been that the purpose of quotas is to make the situation transparent and visible.

Once you make the women visible and the system fair, women get ahead on merit.

‘I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a door-mat or a prostitute’.  This was written by Rebecca West in 1913. How women today deny that they are even feminists?

The business case for women in business is unequivocal, replicated in repeated studies yet companies haemorrhage 50% of their women every five years. We looked at what women had to do to help themselves: map/plan career progression, build their confidence and self belief, understand and work organisational dynamics, find sponsors and the right coaches  and above all – take a chance.

I asked the audience how they would vote on Lord Davies’ 25% quotas for boards in the UK. Only a brave few voted for. Most cited the old concerns about this measure implying a lack of fundamental merit rather than being an invisible group.So they almost 100% all male quotas continue.

Europe in general is working very hard to achieve balance:

•Voluntary targets –Denmark, Germany, Holland

•Government legislation

–Norway: public boards 40% by 1981, Large private 40% by 2008 –France: 20% by 2015,  40% by 2018

–Spain: 40-60% either gender by  2015

–Netherlands: 30% either gender by 2016

–Italy: third each gender by 2015

–Belgium: third each gender 1-8 years to comply

In contrast, the USA:-

•No quotas

•Governance rules: May be asked to disclose whether diversity ‘has been considered’ in choosing board candidates  (!)

Conclusions: We need to change the way we do business

•Open up to wider talent pool

•Actively invest in tailored development for women

•Find effective sponsors, coaches and mentors

•Become market leaders in fostering female talent

•Make the numbers visible

•Keep filling the pipeline

•Value output higher than long hours

I finished with some thoughts about the USA from Miss Representation especially ‘You can’t be what you can’t see’

•At age 7, boys and girls both wanted to be President of USA. . .by age 15, huge disparity – girls have given up the dream

•51% women in the country only 17% women in Congress

•USA rates  90th in world for women in legislature – China, Cuba, Iraq and Afghanistan have more women in government

•Politicians come from 6% of the population

–Male

–White

–Married heterosexuals

–College degrees

–Professional qualification

They laughed when I explained that when Ed Milliband increased the number of women in his cabinet, they were branded ‘Millie’s Fillies’. Live on Sky, reviewing those papers I had chickened out of asking – if the numbers of men had been increased would we have called them Millie’s Willies.

So I ended with the proposition that no, we’re definitely not there yet!

Electronic voting was first put to the test on the question, ‘Should boards be required to adhere to compulsory quotas?’ To my shock and dismay 68% voted NO!
As the evening progressed we voted on a number of questions. Here are just a couple:

Did having children automatically hold women back? The voters said No. The panel said ‘be strategic, have a plan, don’t apologise, find a way to make it work, give solutions not problems’

Pru Leith, who was a brilliant member of the panel, advised ‘faking it’ in various aspects of life. She illustrated how she well she had done this as a Mother by recalling how her son, aged 15 at the time, was  reading a newspaper that had a two page spread on her achievements as ‘Businesswoman of the Year’. ‘But none of this is true. You don’t have 500 people working for you?’, he exclaimed. ‘Of course I do’ she replied,’What do you think pays the school fees?’ ‘But you’re always here’, he said. Working Mothers spend so much time worrying about the impact on their children. Being there at the right times is all they need.

Were senior people in organisations misogynistic? The voters said a resounding Yes, while the panel added that, in the main, much of this was due to unconscious bias rather than deliberate prejudice. Bless them – they didn’t even know they were doing it?

A member of the audience whose first non exec position arose because of Norway’s 40% mandatory quotas ( shall I say that again? 40%, mandatory. Get it? Not 25% and if you don’t mind too much. . .) reported back that, although resistant at first, the men on Norwegian boards were quickly amazed to discover how much women contributed!
Towards the end of the evening the original question ‘Should boards be required to adhere to compulsory quotas?’ This time 70% voted YES!

Prue Leith commented that in the many situations where she experienced  before and after voting she usually despairs at the fact that no-one ever really reconsiders and changes their opinion but that this evening had demonstrated women’s capacity to reflect, learn and be flexible in their thinking – exactly what most organisations needed rather than dyed in the wool traditional approaches.

Sophie Raeworth

chaired the panel of impressive women.She regularly presents the BBC’s One, Six and Ten O’clock news bulletins and has fronted many of the BBC’s big events programmes including the Royal Wedding and the Countdown to 2012. She has also presented several documentaries, including The trouble with working women, and Panorama. Sophie joined the BBC as a trainee in 1993 and worked as a producer and reporter, before joining BBC Breakfast in 1997.

Louise Barnes

Louise has extensive experience across the retail sector. Most recently she was appointed as the executive chairman of Fenn Wright Manson. Prior to this she was CEO of Fat Face where she led the business’s successful growth from 2003 to 2010. Before her role at Fat Face, Louise was Monsoon’s brand director presiding over its successful rebranding and expansion.

Penny Hughes

Penny has been described as one the UK’s outstanding business leaders. At the age of 33, she became president of Coca-Cola UK and Ireland. Since then Penny has held a number of non-executive director positions including The Body Shop, Vodafone, and Trinity Mirror. In December 2009, she was appointed non-executive director of Morrison’s, the UK grocery chain. She is currently a director of Reuters, Home Retail Group, SEB (banking) in Sweden, Gap Inc USA, and was made a non- executive director for RBS in 2010.

Prue Leith

Prue Leith CBE is a restaurateur, caterer, TV cook, broadcaster, and cookery writer. She has also worked as the former director of British Rail, Safeway, Whitbread, Woolworths and Halifax and is currently a non- executive director of Orient Express Hotels Ltd. She has had an active career in charity and not-for-profit businesses, helping to found The British Food Trust.

Kathleen O’Donovan

Kathleen is the co-founder of Bird & Co, who specialise in the training and mentoring of women for the boardroom particularly as non-executive directors. She is currently on the board of four listed companies; Prudential, Great Portland Estates, ARM Holdings, and Trinity Mirror. She is also chairman of the trustees of the Invensys Pension Scheme. Prior to these roles, she worked as a non-executive director for EMI plc and O2, and was also chair of the Bank of England’s Audit Committee.

Allison Pearson

Allison is a Welsh journalist and author who recently wrote I Don’t Know How She Does It which follows the story of a female finance executive who is the breadwinner for her husband and two children. Her book sold over four million copies and the film adaptation, starring Sarah Jessica Parker and Pierce Brosnan, was released this month.

What can redress this?

Making a fuss rather than accepting that it is too complicated to get these changes in place after 41 years so let’s set a target for another 98? Come on!

Getting more women reaching senior positions so that issues like this are dealt with fairly

Ensuring that women recognise their worth and are confident to negotiate on pay and bonuses like their male counterparts always do

Challenging assumptions about the impact of child bearing on a long working life. If you’ve got 40 years, a few years at a different pace because of children should not determine how you are valued for the rest of your days. That’s just a very lazy argument.

Changing the way that part time working is perceived and valued. Currently it is less highly paid by the hour compared to full time work, despite the fact that part time workers often give extra time that mounts up over the years. In the future, more creative ways of working will appeal to many of the younger men too who do not want to replicate the lives of their absent, long hours Dads.

Ensuring that shareholders understand the business benefits on the bottom line of retaining and rewarding female talent. If you own any shares in a company you should be asking them what they are doing about appointing more women and closing the pay gap. Ask for transparency on gender pay gaps and tell everyone the results.

Lobbying parliament through your local MP to scrutinise pay, demand transparency and expose those who perpetuate the gap. One women crying in the wilderness will be pilloried in the press – usually about her appearance -but a ‘Monstrous regiment of women’ (thank you John Knox) might have to be listened to.

We can’t just shrug and let this go because we don’t want to upset the apple cart or because deep down we’re not actually sure ‘we’re worth it’. Don’t you just miss sensible old feminism – the sort that just spoke up when things were unfair?

Click here to download original file

(Please pass this on to anyone in your organisation who would be in a position to authorise the amazing sponsorship opportunity that this first would make)

Growing up, Ann didn’t do particularly well at school until eventually she realised she was bright and could succeed so pushed herself to get good results. Under pressure to get out and get a job, she was working at Natwest before her 16^th birthday. With no clear aspirations, she did well, moving up the organisation. She asked to do banking exams but was told she didn’t need to, while her male counterpart was given day release to study. Often working at the level above her pay grade, training someone a grade above, then going back down to her own level, she was not being promoted. Eventually she ‘found her voice’ asked for promotion and started to progress faster.

Hoping for children, after a series of surgeries she opted for a limited course of IVF treatment. Told that if they returned 3 embryos she had a 17% chance of a single birth, she agreed to all three and became pregnant with triplets. Immediately she felt very strongly that she didn’t want to lose a single one. She loved her pregnancy and eventually gave birth to her three babies. Leaving the hospital a well – meaning nurse said, ‘Having a baby isn’t easy. Accept that, with three, you won’t cope’.  That decided her! Without nannies, but with lots of planning, schedules and strategies, Ann just decided to cope and enjoy her babies. These experiences give big clues to Ann’s coping strategy –a pragmatic, determined approach to dealing with life’s challenges.

When the triplets were 18 months old, Ann’s husband heard of a project involving ordinary women being given the opportunity to walk to the North Pole in a World record attempt. He suggested she apply, as she was always envious of his adventures in the navy. Ann was very nervous. When her kit list arrived she had none of the equipment and couldn’t afford to buy it but by begging and borrowing from friends she assembled what she needed. 200 women applied – many were outward – bound instructors. She was the only one who knew nothing! On Dartmoor, the weather was dire. Carrying her rucksack, shoulders in agony for 10 hours, Ann hated it but she chatted to people, offered to do all the rotten tasks and so stood out. Asked to think what it would be like when they reached the North Pole, she really caught the dream. After 4 days on Dartmoor, training with the SAS, getting one hour’s sleep at a time, amazingly, she began to love it. Finally, there was a road race competition.  While everyone else paced herself, she decided to really go for it. She won!

She was picked for the first leg of the expedition – always the hardest- but a real honour. That gave her 9 months to train. Life became manic. Friends taught her to read maps and pack a rucksack. When her children slept she trained in the back garden, skipping, running circuits or had an hour down the gym each morning while the babies were in the creche. The house was a tip! The media latched on to ‘Mother of triplets goes to the North Pole’. Needless to say, she has had to endure criticism from both the media and other women for having left her children to complete the trip. She knew the children were with their adored grandparents and that she would be away 90 days out of 365. The rest of the time she would be with them full time.

When they reached the Arctic it ‘blew her mind’ and she knew she had found what she was meant to do. As a city dweller she saw that it was nature at its best.

Her next adventure involved putting together an all female team for the South Pole. No women’s team had yet done the whole journey rather than a relay so that was the next challenge. More women had been on the moon than had been to the North Pole. Five of them set off eventually after funding was finally raised. It wasn’t all easy though! With temperatures of minus 30-40 for the first 27 days, dropping to minus 60-70 due to the wind chill, storms which prevented them getting the tent up for shelter, frostbite, carbon monoxide poisoning, deciding whether to pee in your cook pot before or after you ate in it (before, by the way), members of the team being injured and having to leave for the sake of the rest, it was vital to keep focusing on new targets all the time – what had to be done next, the goals that had to be met. One particular fear concerned the immersion suits they dreaded wearing. Challenging their fear by donning the suits to cover thin ice, one of the party went through into the ocean. They mastered the fear and saw the suit as a tool, nothing more. Even on the penultimate day of the journey to the Pole it was still not definite they would make it so they cut back on any unnecessary activity and pressed on, Union Jack in hand. They came excitedly to the last ridge, navigating with watch and sun, then used the GPS as the ground is constantly moving in open water. The planes were coming. They were getting desperate when suddenly their island moved into position over the exact North Pole. No-one had ever, in 6.3 billion years or would ever again, stand on that piece of ice in that exact place. The news hit every front page and deservedly made the News at 10.

Meantime in her personal life, Ann was in a new relationship. The triplets were 9 years old. Having warned her partner of her inability to have more children, she was investigated for a suspected cyst only to find herself pregnant. Her daughter is now 8 years old. When she calls the children from the ice, they are never too bothered about what she is up to – much more concerned with stories from their own lives.

Ann has been a Pathfinder for scientific expeditions, leading the whole team ensuring that they achieved the right pace, collected the scientific samples and were in the right place for the best photography. They hit every target. She has had 5 polar bear encounters. Ann was wearing a beautiful silver polar bear necklace the day we met.

Ann knows she has always been good at assessing and taking risk. However, like so many other women her confidence has not always kept track with her achievements and she has doubts about whether she is good enough. When asked to be a guide, she realised she had done more than anyone else. She continues to work on her personal barriers. While very confident in the ice world, she is still building her talent in the corporate world, learning to project her passion and belief.

Ann’s advice for life:

• Don’t whinge about what you can’t do but look at what you can
• When people tell you you can’t do something, just try harder
• Always have a plan and keep going till you achieve your goals
• Find the best in everything
• Don’t compare with others’ success – look at what you can do, see what is important to you and do it
• Believe in yourself and be the best you can be
• As women, it is up to us to make the changes in ourselves
• Don’t be afraid to fail, keep pushing new boundaries

The qualities you need to succeed:

• Determination
• Bloody mindedness
• Pragmatism
• Having a vision
• Clarity about what is important
• Resilience- don’t do stress just plan to achieve your goal

I was a bit concerned about the large suitcase and rucksack Ann was carrying when she left our office, but when she waved away the offer of a taxi I remembered that there aren’t many taxis at the North Pole . . . . and this was one determined, wonderful woman.

The next big challenge: No woman has ever gone solo to the North Pole. ‘Now is my time’ she says. Her aim is the world record. Ideally, if she can raise the sponsorship in time, she aims to go in February 2012 – Olympic year. If it takes longer to raise sufficient finance in time she may have to wait till 2013 when she will be 47. In this context, age does matter she says so she only has a two year window.

So we all need to get our skates on and do what we can to ensure that Ann gets corporate sponsorship!

Born Heather Renee Sweet, Dita’s obsession with the 1940s was nurtured by her mother, who was a fan of Golden-era Hollywood films. Dita learnt her poise and grace through a classical ballet training. Von Teese remembers being enamored with lacy garments and stockings, and incredibly disappointed when her first bra was that floppy, cotton type we have all, at some point, looked at with a sigh. Working her way up to be a buyer in a lingerie store fuelled Dita’s fondness for elaborate corsets and basques. She went on to study historic costuming, and currently designs many of her own costumes. From humble beginnings emerge great things; Von Teese’s career began against the seedy backdrop of a local strip club, in which her erotic, vintage costume choice drew the interest of a clientele bored by the mediocre sex-pandering of the other women who were, quite simply, strippers. During this time Dita began glamour modeling, eventually branching out into fetish modeling, creating an icon of herself as a retro pin-up.

Dita Von Teese is best known for being “the Queen of Burlesque”, an art form (yes, art form) that she started performing in 1992, and the revival of which she helped to instate, under the term “New Burlesque”. Putting “the tease back into striptease”, Von Teese’s dance shows are long and elaborate, drawing on the tantalizing essence that has gone out of the modern world of sex. These shows are theatrical, using elaborate props, inspired by the ‘30s and ‘40s, including the world’s largest feather fans, and the world-famous martini glass. Von Teese has made herself memorable, once wearing nothing but $5 million worth of diamonds for a benefit for the New York Academy of Art.

A sex symbol, a fantasy, Dita Von Teese has reminded men and women alike of the joys of delayed gratification, the tantalizing mysticism that is present in a woman who does not simply hand it all to men on a plate. More, even, than a sex symbol alone, Von Teese is a business-woman. Just because her product is herself, her sexuality, does not mean that we should dismiss her as a floosie and a harlot. Dita’s official website is often referred to as one of the first model sites on the internet, she pioneered her business, and her business was herself. She has also not simply rested on the laurels of her looks, but is highly educated in the area of her passion, having written her first book, Burlesque and the Art of the Teese, in 2006, and since contributing to many other works around the subject.

Far from suggesting that we all strut around the streets in burlesque get-up, waiting at platform 5 for the 13:14 in a large martini glass, yours truly understands that there is a time and a place for these things, Dita found her niche, worked damn hard, and has made herself a success. She should inspire women in all walks of life, professional or personal, on the one hand to tough it out for what you love, and on the other, to love your own body. No matter what way you look at life, sexuality (or, perhaps, sensuality) is the big question, it is often the elephant in the room, can launch a thousand ships and topple empires. What Von Teese teaches us, is that women don’t have to be enslaved by their sexuality, we can have it on our own terms. Female sexuality is an awe inspiring thing, and if, rather than pandering to what lies behind the dreaded zipper, we instead used our bodies, our urges and our needs to feel empowered, I maintain that our entire gender would undergo a sexual revolution. Dita should inspire us to stop obsessing over our wobbly bits, and more importantly to stop being secretly proud of the bits we like, and instead to stand before the mirror and say, goddam it I’m hot, with all my paunch and cellulite, because you know what, I have control over my own sexuality.

A sex symbol, a business woman, dubbed “a Burlesque Superheroine” by Vanity Fair, Dita Von Teese, whilst perhaps not the role model you might introduce to your children too early on, is someone we should be inspired by once we are old enough. Rather than fighting our sexuality as a tool of male oppression, let’s work with it, let’s change the way men and the world see the female body. Dita Von Teese is undeniably a powerful woman, and her example should remind us that we all have a right to respect without having to become sexless. Every woman in the world holds a great power inside them (cue inspirational music), Von Teese has tapped into hers in her own way. We don’t have to do it her way, but we should be inspired by the fact that she has done it. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m just going to clamber into this giant cup of tea…

By Jessica Bird